The Art of Giving
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Dear Reader, I Repeat: Pay AttentionIn my first post about the art of giving gifts, I told a tale on myself. I wrote about a simple gift – given to me by a near stranger – a gift subtle and powerful enough to spin me into full blown infatuation. I explained that the gift in question – a little bouquet of peach-toned roses – mimicked a flower I wore when I met the man who eventually gave me the present. The fact that he remembered the rose behind my ear a year later, and when we met again handed me a dozen identical blossoms, knocked me for total loop.Commenting on my post, a reader responded: “So the secret is peach-colored roses. Thanks for the inside information!” On reading the comment, my immediate response was, “D’oh! Men!!!” Okay, so my knee-jerk sexist response did nothing to further the cause of better gift-giving, but I had to wonder how he had managed to miss everything I wrote besides “peach-colored” and “roses”.So I say to him, “Yes Leonard, the secret to giving me a gift 20 years ago was peach colored roses.” But that said, one woman’s blindingly romantic rose may be another woman’s prosaic poison ivy. There is no one-size-fits-all present. Everyone’s taste is distinct. If anyone, male or female wants to give a gift that truly hits the mark, they need to pay attention to the target of their gifting.In the case of Carlo, my observant Italian friend, we spoke only briefly when we first met, but he was interested enough to remember the color of the flower in my hair, and rekindled the feeling of our first meeting with the bouquet he later gave me. The next time you have a floral gift to give, a bit of reflection and observation will set you in the right direction. Does this person dress in sharp, chic clothes? Here is a candidate for a simple, sophisticated arrangement. Have you seen her reading romance novels? Does she adore Jane Austen? A bouquet of old-fashioned roses or lilacs will do the trick.Is his home or office done in stark mid-century Modern or antique Asian? Orchids, my friend, send orchids.Without the clue of a flower behind my ear, Carlo would have had to conjecture carefully from other signals to give a gift as moving as the one he presented to me. But those signals come through loud and clear for all those interested enough to listen and pay close attention.
